Psychology of Cheating

Accused of Cheating

Cheating can undermine any relationship. According to the General Social Survey, more than 60% of marriages break due infidelity.

However, if a person is falsely accused of infidelity, it not only causes discord in the relationship but can also lead to traumatic breakups.

What Does It Mean When Someone Accuses You of Cheating?

What to do when everyone accuses you of infidelity

When your partner accuses you of adultery even though you are innocent, it means they are insecure. There’s always a thought in their head that you are spending time with someone else. Trust issues are one of the major causes of relationships being ruined. If your loved one thinks that you are having an affair on the side, even though it is not true, you might need to have a serious discussion with them.

Why You’re Being Accused of Cheating When You’re Innocent

You must have been tired of being accused of cheating. Before you try anything else, it is extremely important to understand why your partner suspects you and retrospect your behavior. Perhaps you are too clingy with your friends, or you are too close with certain co-workers. However, if you don’t spot such a loophole in your behavior and yet keep on getting suspected by your partner, it means that it is not you but your partner who needs some counseling.

How Does an Innocent Person React When Accused of Cheating?

It is quite normal for any person to lose their temper when their spouse or lover is constantly suspicious of them. The first response is usually denial. The innocent person denies cheating on the partner and will also have the guts to confront the accuser. This is because they have nothing to hide. Innocents do not start panicking because they know that there is not a single stain on their conscience.

What to Do When You’ve Been Falsely Accused of Cheating

Being falsely accused is one of the worst experiences in any relationship. The innocent partner feels like the world is crumbling for them. After their sincerity is questioned so many times, they become so disheartened that they don’t even want to prove their truthfulness and just leave. But if you want to save your relationship, then give it one last try.

listen to your feelings

Hear Them Out

It is extremely important to try to understand the other person’s feelings before making any decision. Listen to their reasons why they think you’re lying. Sometimes there may be some good grounds for suspecting you of infidelity.

Understand why you are accused of cheating

Understand Why

After your partner has shared their feelings, try to understand their perspective. It is very easy to get angry, lose your temper, and react adversely, but it will be fruitful if you understand their perspective and try to save your relationship. Accusing your spouse of cheating will not solve the problem; instead, try to find a way out.

Ask your cheating partner questions

Ask Questions

When you have listened to your partner and their perspective, it is time for you to ask questions to understand things better. Is there any particular event that triggered their doubt? Is there any specific person who makes them believe that you are a cheater?

point out to your partner the real facts of the absence of cheating

Point Out the Reality

Now it is time for you to point out reality to your partner and make them understand that their doubt is baseless. One pro tip in this regard would be to not try to prove your opinion by all means. It will make them think that you are guilty. Instead, stay calm and logically prove your point even though being in such a situation when innocent is distressful.

Give your boyfriend or girlfriend time to think

Allow Time for Reflection

You cannot expect a change immediately. Since the belief that you are cheating on them was built in more than a day, it won’t evaporate fast as well. So, allow them some time for reflection.

The Psychological Effects of False Accusations in a Relationship

It may seem that the entire burden is on the person who accuses their partner of cheating. But in reality, being falsely accused brings extreme suffering too. Constant false allegations cause immense stress in the person. Even after being honest, they get such a punishment. No wonder this can cause severe resentment among partners. In extreme cases, it could lead to psychological problems and mental disorders (BPD or PTSD).

Real Stories of Those Unjustly Accused of Cheating in a Relationship

Real stories of unsubstantiated accusations of treason

So many people across the globe are being wrongly accused of cheating every single day. It breaks them down mentally and causes intense psychological stress and dilemma. Let us have a look at the real stories of some people who are dealing with false accusations.

My Boyfriend Always Accuses Me of Cheating and Lying

A woman says that her boyfriend has an Android phone while she has an iPhone. The icon for health apps on iPhones is designed as a heart. Her boyfriend mistakenly presumed it to be a dating app icon and allegedly accused her of lying and cheating.

Wife Accused Me of Cheating

One fine day while driving, a man saw his wife’s panties falling out from the leg hole of his pants. Since he was in the car at that time, he just dumped that underwear into some corner. Later, when he and his wife were cleaning the car together, his wife mistakenly assumed those to be some other woman’s.

Girlfriend Accuses Me of Cheating

A young man reported that his girlfriend went furious after seeing the female contacts on his phone and accused the guy of being guilty. In reality, those numbers were of the boy’s stepmom, cousins, and other female relatives. But she was not ready to accept any truth.

My Husband Keeps Accusing Me of Cheating

A wife said that one of her husband’s friends had spotted her profile on a dating app and had instigated her husband. The husband falsely accused her of cheating on him. In reality, she had a profile before marriage and had taken it down after being married, but somehow it remained active. However, the husband was not ready to listen to any explanation.

How Do Cheating Spouses React to Accusations?

Reaction to an accusation of adultery in marriage

So far, we’ve talked a lot about people who have been wrongly accused of cheating. But what about the people who cheat on their partners in reality? Let us establish some of the traits of people who cheat on their partners:

They Will Deny Everything

The first sign of cheaters is that they will desperately deny everything. And this denial will be vigorous. They will yell and forcibly try to accuse you instead of accepting their fault.

They’ll Try to Reverse the Situation

They will reverse the situation. They will find and bring up your faults (often false) to divert the situation, or they will change the topic to stop discussion on the relevant matter.

They’ll Blame It on You

One of the favorite approaches of a traitor is to accuse the innocent. To prove themselves guilt-free, they will blame it all on you, bringing up irrelevant situations of the past. They might say that you have been making their life impossible.

They’ll Attribute It to Alcohol and Depression

If you have proof of them deceiving you, they will easily blame it all on alcohol and depression. Often, they will say that you have depressed them so much in life that they had to resort to cheating to save their mental health

They’ll Lie Till the End

They will create fake situations and lie like they know nothing about them. They will also make up stories and bring forth false alibis to prove themselves right.

They’ll Say They Were Seduced

The last resort is accusing someone else of having seduced them. This reason is especially put up by men. They will say that they are being falsely accused of cheating on their spouse. 

So, How to Get Rid of the Charge of Betrayal in the Absence of Guilt?

to get rid of the accusation of adultery

If you have been falsely accused of cheating, do not get disheartened at all. Believe in your honesty and never succumb to the accusations. Many soft-hearted people get into depression during such times and start doubting themselves. Avoid doing this. Talk to your partner and stay calm but never doubt your honesty.

FAQs

What does it mean when your girlfriend keeps accusing you of cheating?

It means that she is insecure. It could also mean that some of your actions are forcing her to doubt you. 

Can divorce be caused by false accusations of adultery?

No. Usually, when a person files a divorce case, the court verifies all the proof, and hence false accusations do not stand tall.

How would innocent people react to accusations of cheating?

Innocent people usually get depressed when they are constantly blamed for cheating, and it breaks their hearts when their loved ones suspect them.

What if a narcissist accused you of cheating?

It is a very common activity for selfish people to falsely accuse their partners of cheating. If you already know they are a narcissist, it is best not to react.

Is it normal to feel angry when wrongfully accused of cheating?

Yes. When you have done nothing wrong, it is very usual to get angry in this situation. But it would help if you try to keep your temper under control.